Need I say more? I am the luckiest girl alive!!!
Friday, June 5, 2009
Really sick little guy
Cole is having a breathing "attack" that started Sunday night and I want to journal it so that we can remember it later. It has been almost a full week and he is still really bad.
This was our first time that it happened on anything other than a Saturday night/Sunday morning. At about 1am on Sunday (really Monday June 1) morning, Cole was really struggling to breath. This is him laying in bed. You can't really see him, but you can hear him. It is really a struggle to get air in and out, and there are lots of coughing attacks along with it.
We take him in to sleep with us whenever this happens. I have two dear friends, both strong, healthy 30ish year olds, who passed away this past year in the night because of breathing issues just like this. It literally terrifies me. These two friends (Kelly Knight and Zachary Cox) were healthy, active, grown men, but their asthma actually killed them. I am not ready for my Cole to go so soon. He is our joy and light in our lives.
Here he is in Daddy's arms. This is after the breathing treatments.
We take him outside to breath the night air, and it seems to help, although very little.
He stayed home from school Monday, and I held him all day in bed. He was so weak that he couldn't even talk to me. He just whimpers and points.
Tuesday he begged to go to school, and he seemed a little better so we sent him to school Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday he was miserable again, with fevers, so I kept him home. Today, Friday, he seems to not be any better. I talked to his pulminologist and they say I should take him in to the Emergency Room tomorrow morning if he is not better. I always hate that because they love to admit him at the hospitals... and then we end up spending the week... or month. :)
He sweats when he sleeps and wakes up in the mornings and from naps drenched. I have to change him and his sheets. Sometimes I even have to lay his pillow out to dry.
He gets fevers on and off. It seems to be helped by the baby tylonal.
We are giving him Prednisolone 15mg/5, 4ml 2 x a day. I started this yesterday.
He also does breathing treatments for about half an hour, every four hours. Albuterol and Pulmacourt. I am so lucky to have a nebulizer at home! This is the same machine they use at the hospital, and it makes it so much easier not to have to go to the hospital as often when we can just do it at home.
I don't mean to sound dramatic, but sometimes I feel like I could just start bawling. It gets hard to "hold it together" when your baby is sick. My heart aches for those moms of children who are really sick. It makes me realize how amazingly lucky we are that Cole is so healthy and strong. I think Heavenly Father just knows that I couldn't deal with it being too hard. I remember when we had only had Cole about 3 months, so he was about 7 1/2 months old. He was really sick, and had his full time oxygen, heart monitors, and wouldn't eat anything... I remember sobbing in my office one day, and just begging Father in Heaven, "Please, I am not this strong! I can't handle this. I know you might think I can, but I can't!!" I thought about the promise given to us that we would not be tried or tested more than we could handle. That promise has really gotten me through some dark times. I always know that I can do it, and that I just need to hold on.
I know we will be fine. There are things I am really thankful for.
**Girl's Night Out where I can escape for a few hours and relax. (My Claim Jumper Artichoke and Calizone were sooo good!)
**Backyardingan's DVD... Thanks Auntie Sue!!!
**Doctors and Medications!
**Target's "amazing, why didn't someone think of this before" medication dispensing system. It has truly made me a Target fan for life!
See, the syringe goes into the top, and no mess! Then it goes directly into Cole's tummy tube. Amazing! And since I am doing 14 medications a day this week, this little device has been a huge help! Our Pharmacist at Target even gives me extra stoppers, sot hat we can put them in our Tylonal and other over the counter meds. So great!
**Since he can't talk this week, he is signing everything. It is so precious when he comes in and taps my arm and holds his arms up to me and starts humming. It must not hurt to hum, because that is how he lets me know he is happy. He will hum for me.
**When I ask him how he is doing, he croaks, "not good". So sad, but also so cute!
This morning the school bus driver did not get the message that he was not able to go to school today, so she came by to pick him up. He wanted to go so badly, but keep in mind that he physically could not even say a word! So he stood on the front porch with tears streaming sown his cheeks, and made this little mewling noise, and opening and closed his hand. It was heart breaking! I told him that he could go next time, but he just kept crying the huge tears and mewling!
This was our first time that it happened on anything other than a Saturday night/Sunday morning. At about 1am on Sunday (really Monday June 1) morning, Cole was really struggling to breath. This is him laying in bed. You can't really see him, but you can hear him. It is really a struggle to get air in and out, and there are lots of coughing attacks along with it.
We take him in to sleep with us whenever this happens. I have two dear friends, both strong, healthy 30ish year olds, who passed away this past year in the night because of breathing issues just like this. It literally terrifies me. These two friends (Kelly Knight and Zachary Cox) were healthy, active, grown men, but their asthma actually killed them. I am not ready for my Cole to go so soon. He is our joy and light in our lives.
Here he is in Daddy's arms. This is after the breathing treatments.
We take him outside to breath the night air, and it seems to help, although very little.
He stayed home from school Monday, and I held him all day in bed. He was so weak that he couldn't even talk to me. He just whimpers and points.
Tuesday he begged to go to school, and he seemed a little better so we sent him to school Tuesday and Wednesday. Thursday he was miserable again, with fevers, so I kept him home. Today, Friday, he seems to not be any better. I talked to his pulminologist and they say I should take him in to the Emergency Room tomorrow morning if he is not better. I always hate that because they love to admit him at the hospitals... and then we end up spending the week... or month. :)
He sweats when he sleeps and wakes up in the mornings and from naps drenched. I have to change him and his sheets. Sometimes I even have to lay his pillow out to dry.
He gets fevers on and off. It seems to be helped by the baby tylonal.
We are giving him Prednisolone 15mg/5, 4ml 2 x a day. I started this yesterday.
He also does breathing treatments for about half an hour, every four hours. Albuterol and Pulmacourt. I am so lucky to have a nebulizer at home! This is the same machine they use at the hospital, and it makes it so much easier not to have to go to the hospital as often when we can just do it at home.
I don't mean to sound dramatic, but sometimes I feel like I could just start bawling. It gets hard to "hold it together" when your baby is sick. My heart aches for those moms of children who are really sick. It makes me realize how amazingly lucky we are that Cole is so healthy and strong. I think Heavenly Father just knows that I couldn't deal with it being too hard. I remember when we had only had Cole about 3 months, so he was about 7 1/2 months old. He was really sick, and had his full time oxygen, heart monitors, and wouldn't eat anything... I remember sobbing in my office one day, and just begging Father in Heaven, "Please, I am not this strong! I can't handle this. I know you might think I can, but I can't!!" I thought about the promise given to us that we would not be tried or tested more than we could handle. That promise has really gotten me through some dark times. I always know that I can do it, and that I just need to hold on.
I know we will be fine. There are things I am really thankful for.
**Girl's Night Out where I can escape for a few hours and relax. (My Claim Jumper Artichoke and Calizone were sooo good!)
**Backyardingan's DVD... Thanks Auntie Sue!!!
**Doctors and Medications!
**Target's "amazing, why didn't someone think of this before" medication dispensing system. It has truly made me a Target fan for life!
See, the syringe goes into the top, and no mess! Then it goes directly into Cole's tummy tube. Amazing! And since I am doing 14 medications a day this week, this little device has been a huge help! Our Pharmacist at Target even gives me extra stoppers, sot hat we can put them in our Tylonal and other over the counter meds. So great!
**Since he can't talk this week, he is signing everything. It is so precious when he comes in and taps my arm and holds his arms up to me and starts humming. It must not hurt to hum, because that is how he lets me know he is happy. He will hum for me.**When I ask him how he is doing, he croaks, "not good". So sad, but also so cute!
This morning the school bus driver did not get the message that he was not able to go to school today, so she came by to pick him up. He wanted to go so badly, but keep in mind that he physically could not even say a word! So he stood on the front porch with tears streaming sown his cheeks, and made this little mewling noise, and opening and closed his hand. It was heart breaking! I told him that he could go next time, but he just kept crying the huge tears and mewling!
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Mommy's Day!
Ahhhh.... Mother's Day.
The day of roses and bon bons and breakfast in bed!
Let's take a picture to capture how perfect life is as a mother....
Brighton, are you smiling?
Wow, okay, Bright... a little less intense. Try it again.
Cole, what about you? Are you showing your happy face?
Cole, hunnie, don't give them your angry eyes, show them your happy face.
Okay, well this one turned out ok. But is it too much to wish for a perfect smiling picture with everyone's eyes actually open?
To be fair, I had a wonderful Mother's Day. Delicious breakfast in bed.... Eggs Benedict, my favorite! Made by my sweetheart! Yummy!
And then chocolate dipped strawberries and a long stemmed red rose ordered by my hunnie, but made by the young women of our ward. What a GREAT idea for a fundraiser! Thanks girls... DELICIOUS!!!
Then presents... My Cole-ee made me a flower pot at school and Brighton made me a ladybug magnet.
It really was a fun day.
I love my boys~!!!
Here is my favorite shot.
The day of roses and bon bons and breakfast in bed!
Let's take a picture to capture how perfect life is as a mother....
Brighton, are you smiling?
Wow, okay, Bright... a little less intense. Try it again.
Cole, what about you? Are you showing your happy face?
Cole, hunnie, don't give them your angry eyes, show them your happy face.
Okay, well this one turned out ok. But is it too much to wish for a perfect smiling picture with everyone's eyes actually open?
To be fair, I had a wonderful Mother's Day. Delicious breakfast in bed.... Eggs Benedict, my favorite! Made by my sweetheart! Yummy!
And then chocolate dipped strawberries and a long stemmed red rose ordered by my hunnie, but made by the young women of our ward. What a GREAT idea for a fundraiser! Thanks girls... DELICIOUS!!!
Then presents... My Cole-ee made me a flower pot at school and Brighton made me a ladybug magnet.
It really was a fun day.
I love my boys~!!!
Here is my favorite shot.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Sweet and sincere
Brighton came home from school today, and ran right into my office where I was at the computer. He rides the bus to and from school. He was really excited to tell me something, but was holding his arm in a weird way. I could see major "raspberries" on his arm... like almost bleeding, but not quite. I said, "Brighton, what happened? Are you okay?"
And he smiled really big, (while still holding his injured arm) and said, "Yeah, I am okay now mom. My arm got caught in the thing like this (and then he makes arm motions to show me what the "thing" looks like) and it hurt so so so bad. And I kept trying to get it out, but I couldn't and I was scared, so I asked Jesus to help me, and he did!
Yep... it works. Step by step, line upon line, precept on precept... We teach and try to help them learn, but it isn't in one lesson that they get it. It is every morning and every night listening to their prayers, sitting with them every Sunday at church, and as my cute sister Mitzi pointed out continuing to have Family Home Evenings every week even when it feels like no one is getting anything out of it.
Bill and I just looked at each other and smiled. I am so thankful we were both there to hear such a sweet sentence come out of our darling boy's mouth. Brighton is a joy to have as a son. He is a wonderful kid, and a terrific friend.
About a half hour later, while he was eating his after school treat of waffles with peanut butter and whipped cream (His all time favorite food this year) he yelled from the living room to the kitchen to me, "I love you super, duper, ooper, smooper, duper, duper much mom! More than T-rexes mom, and that is a lot!!!" I peeked my head around the door to look at him, and he was smiling so darling at me. I just wanted to cry! He has been really great this past week and a half. I keep joking that maybe we should go away more often, because ever since he spent 3 days with our sweet friends Krissie, Mike and Sue Ward, he has been an angel. (Seriously guys... what did you do to him? He is soooo happy!)
Being a mom is so great!
Some of my favorite pics of Bright. I love this one.... caught in the act, with one finger trying to be sneaky.... and take a preview taste of his half birthday cake. I call this one "What cha doin?
While we were waiting for the Balboa ferry, this car was in front of us. Bright was fascinated. He jumped out of our car to "get a closer look." The men driving it were tickled to see how enthralled Bright was with it... and them let him pretend to drive it.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
I am so thankful for family reunions!
My darling friend Abby has thankful Thursday each week on her blog. Well, I am not nearly as organized as she is... and I never make the time to blog regularly, so I am going to see if I can back date some posts from past Thursdays.... Here it goes...
Today is really Friday, May 8, but I am going to try to post this as Thursday, May 7.
testing, 1, 2, 3, testing...
I am so thankful that Cole is a part of this amazing family!
I imagine that up in Heaven, when Heavenly Father was assigning out families... Cole must have jumped for joy when he was assigned to be a part of the Whiting, Brown, Bodell, Gates, Johnson family! We have such an amazing heritage of love and laughter, and strength. As I watched my little boy dancing and playing with his 100 plus cousins last weekend I got teary eyed a few times realizing how blessed he is to have such an amazing group of cousins, aunts and uncles who love him so much. I am so thankful Heavenly Father sent him to our house to live!!!
I missed it when he was going full speed like a crazy boy... but you can still get the idea with this video clip.
Thanks to Amy for organizing such a GREAT reunion up at Warm Springs. It was AWESOME!!
Today is really Friday, May 8, but I am going to try to post this as Thursday, May 7.
testing, 1, 2, 3, testing...
I am so thankful that Cole is a part of this amazing family!
I imagine that up in Heaven, when Heavenly Father was assigning out families... Cole must have jumped for joy when he was assigned to be a part of the Whiting, Brown, Bodell, Gates, Johnson family! We have such an amazing heritage of love and laughter, and strength. As I watched my little boy dancing and playing with his 100 plus cousins last weekend I got teary eyed a few times realizing how blessed he is to have such an amazing group of cousins, aunts and uncles who love him so much. I am so thankful Heavenly Father sent him to our house to live!!!
I missed it when he was going full speed like a crazy boy... but you can still get the idea with this video clip.
Thanks to Amy for organizing such a GREAT reunion up at Warm Springs. It was AWESOME!!
Friday, May 1, 2009
Shamrocks and Leprachans!
My best St. Patrick's Day ever!
Having a 5 year old around for the holidays is the greatest joy in the world! Brighton is ALL ABOUT the holidays! He has learned the meaning and the traditions
and he thinks any excuse to pinch people is super great!
Those sneaky leprachans
Having a 5 year old around for the holidays is the greatest joy in the world! Brighton is ALL ABOUT the holidays! He has learned the meaning and the traditions
and he thinks any excuse to pinch people is super great!
Those sneaky leprachans
Friday, April 10, 2009
What to do on a rainy day with 6 kids!
My darling Dittbrenner nieces and nephew are visiting for the week. That means 6 kids (11, 9, 6, 5, 5, 3) in my very small house. We were planning a beach day today, but when we woke up to rain we had to make some adjustments....
We still got to eat at Ruby's, just not on the pier and not on the roof! We went to Ruby's on Woodbridge Lake.
Take one: Oops! Dillon's "rocker pose" gets in front of Dixie, and she gets miffed.
Take two: Brighton's Airplane gets in front of Dixie... now she is TICKED!
Take three: aahhhh! Finally.... She is much happier now.
(Please note: Dillon loves to pose "Rocker". He totally gets this from his dad Wayne. It is like.... AAHHHHHHH I am ROCKER!!!!!! It is hilarious.)
Then we went to see Coraline the movie at the Dollar theaters. (Thank heavens for dollar theaters!) It was cute. Darcy, Dixie and I really liked it. The other kids got a little scared. Brighton and Cole got very scared. Brighton kept standing up and shouting, "Is she dead yet mom? Did they kill her? It was very funny!
After that we went to the McDonalds Playland.
When we came home the rain had finally stopped so they played outside for a few hours.
The boys played basketball for a few hours. Thank you Collins family for our awesome basketball hoop! We love it!
I told Dillon to smile... of course he did the rocker pose.
Seriously... how great are cousins! They have so much fun together!
We have had a great week and will hate to see them go home tomorrow.
Some of my Favorite things:
Watching Bright and Dillon do things together. They are crazy about each other. I love that he has a close boy cousin to be best friends with. I hope they stay close forever.
All three younger Ditts LOVE having their picture taken. They will ask you to take more as long as you will keep going.
Dillon starts every sentence with, "I have something to say." It is really cute. Like he really wants to be acknowledged.
Darcy is a GREAT babysitter. I sure wish she lived close by me..... hmmmmm... maybe this summer......
And of course, Dillon's Rocker Pose!
We still got to eat at Ruby's, just not on the pier and not on the roof! We went to Ruby's on Woodbridge Lake.
Take one: Oops! Dillon's "rocker pose" gets in front of Dixie, and she gets miffed.
Take two: Brighton's Airplane gets in front of Dixie... now she is TICKED!
Take three: aahhhh! Finally.... She is much happier now.
(Please note: Dillon loves to pose "Rocker". He totally gets this from his dad Wayne. It is like.... AAHHHHHHH I am ROCKER!!!!!! It is hilarious.)Then we went to see Coraline the movie at the Dollar theaters. (Thank heavens for dollar theaters!) It was cute. Darcy, Dixie and I really liked it. The other kids got a little scared. Brighton and Cole got very scared. Brighton kept standing up and shouting, "Is she dead yet mom? Did they kill her? It was very funny!
After that we went to the McDonalds Playland.
When we came home the rain had finally stopped so they played outside for a few hours.
The boys played basketball for a few hours. Thank you Collins family for our awesome basketball hoop! We love it!
I told Dillon to smile... of course he did the rocker pose.
Seriously... how great are cousins! They have so much fun together!
We have had a great week and will hate to see them go home tomorrow.
Some of my Favorite things:
Watching Bright and Dillon do things together. They are crazy about each other. I love that he has a close boy cousin to be best friends with. I hope they stay close forever.
All three younger Ditts LOVE having their picture taken. They will ask you to take more as long as you will keep going.
Dillon starts every sentence with, "I have something to say." It is really cute. Like he really wants to be acknowledged.
Darcy is a GREAT babysitter. I sure wish she lived close by me..... hmmmmm... maybe this summer......
And of course, Dillon's Rocker Pose!
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